Welcome to Find Mr Right: How to get finding Mr Right consistently wrong! Let’s get started with something pivotal to you finding your Mr Right. * What a woman wants and what a woman finds attractive tend to be two very different things. I’ll give you a typical example: I could ask Joanne what she wants in a guy and she could give me a list of qualities. So let’s say for example Joanne wants a guy that makes her laugh, is confident and assertive, considerate, trustworthy, compassionate and romantic. It just so happens that a guy called Dave fits the description perfectly. The two of them bump into each other by chance and within the space of ten seconds Joanne decides she doesn’t find him attractive and moves on. However, later the same day Joanne bumps into Mark and within ten seconds she realises she finds him attractive and flirts with him hoping he’ll ask her out on a date. The interesting thing is that Mark doesn’t actually have any of the qualities Joanne wants in a guy. However she finds him attractive, they have ‘chemistry’ and in all honesty she doesn’t really consider his suitability as a long term partner. As time passes and she gets to know the real Mark the initial attraction begins to wane. However because Joanne has already invested so much time, effort and emotional energy into the relationship - she wants to make it ‘right’. Unfortunately she feels increasingly frustrated Mark isn’t all the things she assumed he would be. Maybe she’ll make it her mission to try and change him into what she does want… but alas it’s doomed to fail. In logical terms Joanne’s behaviour makes little sense, but she’ll fail and fail again hoping next time it’ll turn out better. The ironic thing is that people around her can see she’s going for guys with qualities well outside of what she actually wants. However, Joanne simply can’t see it that way… and here’s why: Fatal attraction The problem many women have is that they are strongly driven by ‘attraction instinct’. It has after all been responsible for the reproduction of our species for hundreds of thousands of years. Unfortunately, over recent times our social structure has changed far faster than our instincts… thus what worked for us in ancient times is now significantly out of date. Our requirements have also shifted along with our social development, but unfortunately our attraction instinct has not. So generally speaking, what you want at an intellectual level through your intelligence and reasoning is being overwritten by the instinctive part of your mind making you feel attraction for guys that would have been more genetically suitable for you as a mate in a bygone age. This attraction instinct is beyond conscious awareness hence many women seem to be blind to their ongoing poor selection of potential suitors. I guess it’s easy to be objective when it’s a friend or family member being messed around by some worthless guy, but in reality when it happens to you it can be difficult to view the situation clearly. This isn’t a criticism of women – it’s a fact… and the sooner you can accept that your auto-pilot relationship strategies probably aren’t serving you, the sooner we can start making some positive changes and get you into a healthy, loving, fulfilling relationship. No nonsense tactics Now here’s a bit of a warning up front. What I teach works in the real world - it’s not some academic theory. If you use the information, techniques and mindsets I’m going to discuss with you, you will succeed in creating a wonderful relationship. If you go about things half-heartedly because it’s different, uncomfortable or ‘not you’ then your results will probably be significantly diluted. At the end of the day it has to be your decision and what you decide will depend on how much you want your dream relationship to happen. The application of what you learn from me is your responsibility and nobody else’s. You will reap what you sow in terms of results. You may have gathered by now that I don’t sugar coat things and there’s good reason for this. Positive results and healthy, loving, sharing relationships don’t need sugar coating – it’s only excuses, sympathy and half-hearted effort that need sweetening to make them more palatable. I work only with the former, I call a spade a spade and I genuinely want to help you to help yourself. Dismissing the social lies As a woman you know how it is from a female perspective, in terms of what you want, how you feel and what a wonderful relationship means to you at the deepest level. Now if you think a guy perceives things the same way, wants the same things as you and understands how you think and feel – you are very mistaken. Much of our social upbringing is based upon un-truths (or lies if you call a spade a spade). Political correctness and ‘equality’ over the past sixty years has destroyed much of what nature has created over hundreds of thousands of years. Equality is great in context and I’m all for fairness, but unfortunately equality has become accepted as ‘sameness’ and this in itself has compromised our natural behaviour… particularly in the case of men.